Newly diagnosed

Hi Susan, thanks so much for your comforting words, I really appreciate it. I am already considering doing a body map to make it easier to observe the moles. I also have two moles which I'd like the derm to re-check again tomorrow, cause the one is atypical (no changes as far I can tell) and the other one has unfortunately changed over several years (I noticed that on the weekend while going through some five-year old vaccation pics). The derm did not comment on it on my last visit (when I pointed out the MM to be). It is approx. 2mm of diameter, pretty symmetric, pretty one-coloured, not elevated, just a small dot, but it has darkened and grown a bit compared to the pics I found and I just wanna have it cut out tomorrow together with the WLE. (Can a mole change over years and still be benign?) Hope it's turns out well or at least not worse than melanoma we noticed in November. Nervous as hell, though. Guess this is my new attribute for my upcoming years…

Hi Susan, thanks so much for your comforting words, I really appreciate it. I am already considering doing a body map to make it easier to observe the moles. I also have two moles which I'd like the derm to re-check again tomorrow, cause the one is atypical (no changes as far I can tell) and the other one has unfortunately changed over several years (I noticed that on the weekend while going through some five-year old vaccation pics). The derm did not comment on it on my last visit (when I pointed out the MM to be). It is approx. 2mm of diameter, pretty symmetric, pretty one-coloured, not elevated, just a small dot, but it has darkened and grown a bit compared to the pics I found and I just wanna have it cut out tomorrow together with the WLE. (Can a mole change over years and still be benign?) Hope it's turns out well or at least not worse than melanoma we noticed in November. Nervous as hell, though. Guess this is my new attribute for my upcoming years…

Hi Susan, thanks so much for your comforting words, I really appreciate it. I am already considering doing a body map to make it easier to observe the moles. I also have two moles which I'd like the derm to re-check again tomorrow, cause the one is atypical (no changes as far I can tell) and the other one has unfortunately changed over several years (I noticed that on the weekend while going through some five-year old vaccation pics). The derm did not comment on it on my last visit (when I pointed out the MM to be). It is approx. 2mm of diameter, pretty symmetric, pretty one-coloured, not elevated, just a small dot, but it has darkened and grown a bit compared to the pics I found and I just wanna have it cut out tomorrow together with the WLE. (Can a mole change over years and still be benign?) Hope it's turns out well or at least not worse than melanoma we noticed in November. Nervous as hell, though. Guess this is my new attribute for my upcoming years…

Hi Ashley, thanks for your response, too. I am glad to hear you are NED and wish you so much it won't change in the future! 

It is horrible to read that your disease has spread, and, moreover, during pregnancy… I will have to think that through and to speak to some experts, perhaps. But honestly, as much as it may sound irrational, if nothing changes (and I do not wish anything more), I'll probably risk that. I can imagine my life without kids, but not sure I imagine it without trying 🙂 And I cstill see one doctor's reply p in a forum to a girl with a slightly worse diagnosis: "Your prognosis is great. We do not know for sure whether there actually is a connection between MM and pregnancy. We give births to kids and no one of us can say we will see them grow up. I would not hesitate." 

Of course, there is the fact with placental transmission which scares me a lot… We have to discuss it thoroughly…I wish there were clear answers… 

And say hi to your husband! Yes, I am pretty sure the "e" is an American addition 

Hi Ashley, thanks for your response, too. I am glad to hear you are NED and wish you so much it won't change in the future! 

It is horrible to read that your disease has spread, and, moreover, during pregnancy… I will have to think that through and to speak to some experts, perhaps. But honestly, as much as it may sound irrational, if nothing changes (and I do not wish anything more), I'll probably risk that. I can imagine my life without kids, but not sure I imagine it without trying 🙂 And I cstill see one doctor's reply p in a forum to a girl with a slightly worse diagnosis: "Your prognosis is great. We do not know for sure whether there actually is a connection between MM and pregnancy. We give births to kids and no one of us can say we will see them grow up. I would not hesitate." 

Of course, there is the fact with placental transmission which scares me a lot… We have to discuss it thoroughly…I wish there were clear answers… 

And say hi to your husband! Yes, I am pretty sure the "e" is an American addition 

Hi Ashley, thanks for your response, too. I am glad to hear you are NED and wish you so much it won't change in the future! 

It is horrible to read that your disease has spread, and, moreover, during pregnancy… I will have to think that through and to speak to some experts, perhaps. But honestly, as much as it may sound irrational, if nothing changes (and I do not wish anything more), I'll probably risk that. I can imagine my life without kids, but not sure I imagine it without trying 🙂 And I cstill see one doctor's reply p in a forum to a girl with a slightly worse diagnosis: "Your prognosis is great. We do not know for sure whether there actually is a connection between MM and pregnancy. We give births to kids and no one of us can say we will see them grow up. I would not hesitate." 

Of course, there is the fact with placental transmission which scares me a lot… We have to discuss it thoroughly…I wish there were clear answers… 

And say hi to your husband! Yes, I am pretty sure the "e" is an American addition 

Thanks Susan! I had clear margins already after the basic excision, the derm told me the WLE had to be done as a standard precautionary meassure (which I do not object at all, I'd rather have dozens scars than worsen my prognosis…), but stated it was already perfectly out at that time. I will talk to him today about the other moles and then… I have to consider things carefully. 

I'm a bit frustrated about the lack of information about melanoma here in my country, though. The top melanoma oncologist I spoke to was very kind, but he's located three hours drive from my place. He told me he would be happy to take care of me if I decided to, but given the fact that the standard procedure in my stage are derm check-ups twice a year, he literally said that driving 2x 500 km on Czech roads would mean greater threat to my life than my current diagnosis  I still consider doing that, though, as only talking to him was so hopeful and strength-giving! (As opposed to my derm who told me that my prognosis is great but it's only statistics and one never knows what will happen to me – as much as I know it is basically true, I'd prefer to get some comfort and reassurance, especially when the odds are on my side…)

So, I am pretty lucky to be able to understand English, because Czech websites do not offer much. There is only one, but was updated ay ear ago and offers no information on different research, etc. 

Thanks Susan! I had clear margins already after the basic excision, the derm told me the WLE had to be done as a standard precautionary meassure (which I do not object at all, I'd rather have dozens scars than worsen my prognosis…), but stated it was already perfectly out at that time. I will talk to him today about the other moles and then… I have to consider things carefully. 

I'm a bit frustrated about the lack of information about melanoma here in my country, though. The top melanoma oncologist I spoke to was very kind, but he's located three hours drive from my place. He told me he would be happy to take care of me if I decided to, but given the fact that the standard procedure in my stage are derm check-ups twice a year, he literally said that driving 2x 500 km on Czech roads would mean greater threat to my life than my current diagnosis  I still consider doing that, though, as only talking to him was so hopeful and strength-giving! (As opposed to my derm who told me that my prognosis is great but it's only statistics and one never knows what will happen to me – as much as I know it is basically true, I'd prefer to get some comfort and reassurance, especially when the odds are on my side…)

So, I am pretty lucky to be able to understand English, because Czech websites do not offer much. There is only one, but was updated ay ear ago and offers no information on different research, etc. 

Thanks Susan! I had clear margins already after the basic excision, the derm told me the WLE had to be done as a standard precautionary meassure (which I do not object at all, I'd rather have dozens scars than worsen my prognosis…), but stated it was already perfectly out at that time. I will talk to him today about the other moles and then… I have to consider things carefully. 

I'm a bit frustrated about the lack of information about melanoma here in my country, though. The top melanoma oncologist I spoke to was very kind, but he's located three hours drive from my place. He told me he would be happy to take care of me if I decided to, but given the fact that the standard procedure in my stage are derm check-ups twice a year, he literally said that driving 2x 500 km on Czech roads would mean greater threat to my life than my current diagnosis  I still consider doing that, though, as only talking to him was so hopeful and strength-giving! (As opposed to my derm who told me that my prognosis is great but it's only statistics and one never knows what will happen to me – as much as I know it is basically true, I'd prefer to get some comfort and reassurance, especially when the odds are on my side…)

So, I am pretty lucky to be able to understand English, because Czech websites do not offer much. There is only one, but was updated ay ear ago and offers no information on different research, etc. 

Hi Janner, thanks a lot. Today, I underwent the WLE. I also asked him to check for the other two moles. He told me the one should be excised (although he stated it does not really bare melanome symptoms and that clinically, it looks like a 3mm dark junctional nevus), but wanted me to wait for the excision couple of weeks again, so I told him into doing that at one time, but was asked to pay for that and I do not consider it really OK as he stated himself the mole should better be taken out…:-/ So I decided to leave him after the WLE (have to wait the results of this mole, though), coz I really really hate his attitude (he is basically saying me my prospects are bad all the time). I wrote to this oncologist guy and asked for an appointment. I just want to consult my case and discuss it with a top expert, and then, I will find another dermatologist who can look after me, with a more optimistic approach, near my place…

I also wrote a question to another melanoma specialist, asking what is the recommended procedure nowadays after WLE with stage 1A. I do not want to miss anything, but I just want to make sure what is right. Coz the derm today made me feel horrible and keep on stressing out that not undergoing the ultrasound and x-rays almost immediately is a hazardous decision…(well, I just wanted to postpone the January date cause I realised I won´t be around and I really do believe three weeks postoponing would not mean that much). He somehow forgot the fact that he let me wait for the excision of A VERY suspicious lesion for five weeks, which I do not consider OK in the first place…it could be even thinner, who knows, if he was more pro-active 🙁

Sorry for a long comment, but I am sort of disappointed with him right now. I mean of course I do know the risks and know that my diagnosis is serious, but on the other hand, I need someone optimistic who will make me believe that together, we can always figure things out no matter what….or at least try and not be pessimistic right from the beginning. If you know what I mean…:-(

Hi Janner, thanks a lot. Today, I underwent the WLE. I also asked him to check for the other two moles. He told me the one should be excised (although he stated it does not really bare melanome symptoms and that clinically, it looks like a 3mm dark junctional nevus), but wanted me to wait for the excision couple of weeks again, so I told him into doing that at one time, but was asked to pay for that and I do not consider it really OK as he stated himself the mole should better be taken out…:-/ So I decided to leave him after the WLE (have to wait the results of this mole, though), coz I really really hate his attitude (he is basically saying me my prospects are bad all the time). I wrote to this oncologist guy and asked for an appointment. I just want to consult my case and discuss it with a top expert, and then, I will find another dermatologist who can look after me, with a more optimistic approach, near my place…

I also wrote a question to another melanoma specialist, asking what is the recommended procedure nowadays after WLE with stage 1A. I do not want to miss anything, but I just want to make sure what is right. Coz the derm today made me feel horrible and keep on stressing out that not undergoing the ultrasound and x-rays almost immediately is a hazardous decision…(well, I just wanted to postpone the January date cause I realised I won´t be around and I really do believe three weeks postoponing would not mean that much). He somehow forgot the fact that he let me wait for the excision of A VERY suspicious lesion for five weeks, which I do not consider OK in the first place…it could be even thinner, who knows, if he was more pro-active 🙁

Sorry for a long comment, but I am sort of disappointed with him right now. I mean of course I do know the risks and know that my diagnosis is serious, but on the other hand, I need someone optimistic who will make me believe that together, we can always figure things out no matter what….or at least try and not be pessimistic right from the beginning. If you know what I mean…:-(

Hi Janner, thanks a lot. Today, I underwent the WLE. I also asked him to check for the other two moles. He told me the one should be excised (although he stated it does not really bare melanome symptoms and that clinically, it looks like a 3mm dark junctional nevus), but wanted me to wait for the excision couple of weeks again, so I told him into doing that at one time, but was asked to pay for that and I do not consider it really OK as he stated himself the mole should better be taken out…:-/ So I decided to leave him after the WLE (have to wait the results of this mole, though), coz I really really hate his attitude (he is basically saying me my prospects are bad all the time). I wrote to this oncologist guy and asked for an appointment. I just want to consult my case and discuss it with a top expert, and then, I will find another dermatologist who can look after me, with a more optimistic approach, near my place…

I also wrote a question to another melanoma specialist, asking what is the recommended procedure nowadays after WLE with stage 1A. I do not want to miss anything, but I just want to make sure what is right. Coz the derm today made me feel horrible and keep on stressing out that not undergoing the ultrasound and x-rays almost immediately is a hazardous decision…(well, I just wanted to postpone the January date cause I realised I won´t be around and I really do believe three weeks postoponing would not mean that much). He somehow forgot the fact that he let me wait for the excision of A VERY suspicious lesion for five weeks, which I do not consider OK in the first place…it could be even thinner, who knows, if he was more pro-active 🙁

Sorry for a long comment, but I am sort of disappointed with him right now. I mean of course I do know the risks and know that my diagnosis is serious, but on the other hand, I need someone optimistic who will make me believe that together, we can always figure things out no matter what….or at least try and not be pessimistic right from the beginning. If you know what I mean…:-(

And moreover, after I asked him whether it was possible to change the ultrasound + x-rays date, he told me that he was not sure the WLE made any sense today…? That usually, it is done after the ultrasound and x-ray because their outcome might change the procedure. Have you ever heard about it? The original dates were still WLE first and ultra + x-ray afterwards, so I do not know what he was talking about. Inbasically made him to do that today no matter of the date of further proceeding…

And moreover, after I asked him whether it was possible to change the ultrasound + x-rays date, he told me that he was not sure the WLE made any sense today…? That usually, it is done after the ultrasound and x-ray because their outcome might change the procedure. Have you ever heard about it? The original dates were still WLE first and ultra + x-ray afterwards, so I do not know what he was talking about. Inbasically made him to do that today no matter of the date of further proceeding…

And moreover, after I asked him whether it was possible to change the ultrasound + x-rays date, he told me that he was not sure the WLE made any sense today…? That usually, it is done after the ultrasound and x-ray because their outcome might change the procedure. Have you ever heard about it? The original dates were still WLE first and ultra + x-ray afterwards, so I do not know what he was talking about. Inbasically made him to do that today no matter of the date of further proceeding…

They wanted to ultrasound abdomen and lymph nodes. No plan to do SNB which does not make any sense to me either…so I was kinda surprised he said to me that we should not do the WLE toda, if we postpone the ultrasound and x-ray from January 14 to February 10 (let's say). I just do not get it and I honestly think it was slightly personal, because I keep on asking all the questions. 

That just added to my decision to change him, as I simply do not trust him absolutely… I hope I am not doing any mistake.

The oncologist I am trying to get to told me he sees no reason to undergo ultrasound and x-ray, and that I should relax after the WLE and find a new derm. And that is what I am probably gonna do… Am i crazy? 🙁

and thanks again for your support… I am really upset today as it would be a lot easier if I had a doctor I could rely on from the very beginning…

They wanted to ultrasound abdomen and lymph nodes. No plan to do SNB which does not make any sense to me either…so I was kinda surprised he said to me that we should not do the WLE toda, if we postpone the ultrasound and x-ray from January 14 to February 10 (let's say). I just do not get it and I honestly think it was slightly personal, because I keep on asking all the questions. 

That just added to my decision to change him, as I simply do not trust him absolutely… I hope I am not doing any mistake.

The oncologist I am trying to get to told me he sees no reason to undergo ultrasound and x-ray, and that I should relax after the WLE and find a new derm. And that is what I am probably gonna do… Am i crazy? 🙁

and thanks again for your support… I am really upset today as it would be a lot easier if I had a doctor I could rely on from the very beginning…

They wanted to ultrasound abdomen and lymph nodes. No plan to do SNB which does not make any sense to me either…so I was kinda surprised he said to me that we should not do the WLE toda, if we postpone the ultrasound and x-ray from January 14 to February 10 (let's say). I just do not get it and I honestly think it was slightly personal, because I keep on asking all the questions. 

That just added to my decision to change him, as I simply do not trust him absolutely… I hope I am not doing any mistake.

The oncologist I am trying to get to told me he sees no reason to undergo ultrasound and x-ray, and that I should relax after the WLE and find a new derm. And that is what I am probably gonna do… Am i crazy? 🙁

and thanks again for your support… I am really upset today as it would be a lot easier if I had a doctor I could rely on from the very beginning…

Thanks so much, Janner, I get the point. 

He told me he saw "many" stage 1A patient showing mets on these initial scans, and that it is better to "diagnose it right now than to wait for swollen lymph nodes"… And as much as I know it can happen, I desperately need a doctor who will state the facts but will remain positive (when there is a reason to be, of course). Or perhaps I'm just having too hard times accepting the reality?

One positive thing: the WLE is hurting much less I expected it to be (so far), but let's see if I'm gonna be able to sleep 🙂 (It's 9:30 pm here…)

Thanks so much, Janner, I get the point. 

He told me he saw "many" stage 1A patient showing mets on these initial scans, and that it is better to "diagnose it right now than to wait for swollen lymph nodes"… And as much as I know it can happen, I desperately need a doctor who will state the facts but will remain positive (when there is a reason to be, of course). Or perhaps I'm just having too hard times accepting the reality?

One positive thing: the WLE is hurting much less I expected it to be (so far), but let's see if I'm gonna be able to sleep 🙂 (It's 9:30 pm here…)

Thanks so much, Janner, I get the point. 

He told me he saw "many" stage 1A patient showing mets on these initial scans, and that it is better to "diagnose it right now than to wait for swollen lymph nodes"… And as much as I know it can happen, I desperately need a doctor who will state the facts but will remain positive (when there is a reason to be, of course). Or perhaps I'm just having too hard times accepting the reality?

One positive thing: the WLE is hurting much less I expected it to be (so far), but let's see if I'm gonna be able to sleep 🙂 (It's 9:30 pm here…)

That is exactly how I feel it. I know there is no guarantee with this diagnosis, but exactly as you stated, I do not need anyone who keeps on scaring me off and is actually in favour of the real, yet far less probable bad outcome…

Just for your interest, he said to make the ultrasound and x-rays are done also in melanoma-in-situ patients, as "nothing is granted for them either"…I though T0 is basically 100% cured by excision…?

Thank you again, Janner, I'm feeling a lot better today and cannot appreciate your replies enough…

That is exactly how I feel it. I know there is no guarantee with this diagnosis, but exactly as you stated, I do not need anyone who keeps on scaring me off and is actually in favour of the real, yet far less probable bad outcome…

Just for your interest, he said to make the ultrasound and x-rays are done also in melanoma-in-situ patients, as "nothing is granted for them either"…I though T0 is basically 100% cured by excision…?

Thank you again, Janner, I'm feeling a lot better today and cannot appreciate your replies enough…

That is exactly how I feel it. I know there is no guarantee with this diagnosis, but exactly as you stated, I do not need anyone who keeps on scaring me off and is actually in favour of the real, yet far less probable bad outcome…

Just for your interest, he said to make the ultrasound and x-rays are done also in melanoma-in-situ patients, as "nothing is granted for them either"…I though T0 is basically 100% cured by excision…?

Thank you again, Janner, I'm feeling a lot better today and cannot appreciate your replies enough…