› Forums › Cutaneous Melanoma Community › Need answers for my mom
- This topic has 48 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 4 months ago by
JimS.
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- October 22, 2014 at 11:25 pm
Hi,Jim here from Ohio.About a year and a half ago,my mom got what I guess could be called a small lump-like thing on her arm.It looked like an infected mole or an infected bite of some sort.It was purple.Her regular doc said it didnt look like cancer to her and prescribed a cream for it.My mom said the cream seemed to help for a while but it ran out.When she called her doc,the doc said to see a dermatologist to be safe.The visit was today.The dermatologist looked and said she couldnt rule anything out.She said it could be an infected lesion,treatable skin cancer or melanoma,as she said some melanomas are purple.She did a biopsy and then removed the rest.We now wait 7-10 days for results and we are all scared.My mom just lost her sister,my aunt,to lymphoma and is certain she now has melanoma.Any advice or info would be greatly appreciated.Please help!!And thanks.
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- October 23, 2014 at 12:08 am
Unfortunately, you will really have to wait for the biopsy report. Melanoma just isn't diagnosed reliably from just "looking". Hopefully, the results will come in quicker and you can go from there. If it does end up melanoma, get a copy of the pathology report. Any help we give here would rely on that as the main source of info. Fingers crossed that you really don't have to come back here!
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- October 23, 2014 at 12:08 am
Unfortunately, you will really have to wait for the biopsy report. Melanoma just isn't diagnosed reliably from just "looking". Hopefully, the results will come in quicker and you can go from there. If it does end up melanoma, get a copy of the pathology report. Any help we give here would rely on that as the main source of info. Fingers crossed that you really don't have to come back here!
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- October 23, 2014 at 12:08 am
Unfortunately, you will really have to wait for the biopsy report. Melanoma just isn't diagnosed reliably from just "looking". Hopefully, the results will come in quicker and you can go from there. If it does end up melanoma, get a copy of the pathology report. Any help we give here would rely on that as the main source of info. Fingers crossed that you really don't have to come back here!
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- October 23, 2014 at 12:43 am
Pre-worry never helped anyone, but I doubt that will help mom. Everyone here knows and hates the waiting game, we do it all the time. Scans, biopsy results, it's the bane of a cancer patient. Unfortunately, there is no magic bullet for waiting. Sorry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 12:43 am
Pre-worry never helped anyone, but I doubt that will help mom. Everyone here knows and hates the waiting game, we do it all the time. Scans, biopsy results, it's the bane of a cancer patient. Unfortunately, there is no magic bullet for waiting. Sorry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 12:43 am
Pre-worry never helped anyone, but I doubt that will help mom. Everyone here knows and hates the waiting game, we do it all the time. Scans, biopsy results, it's the bane of a cancer patient. Unfortunately, there is no magic bullet for waiting. Sorry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 6:22 am
Something you might take hope in is that, from what you've said, your mom's lump doesn't appear to have grown or changed much over the past year and a half. My dad's primary melanoma was also a small fleshy-pink colored lump, but it grew upwards, outwards and, we later found out, in depth at a very fast pace. Within just a couple months, it had doubled in size and went from the size of a pencil eraser to the size of a golf ball between April and September. His tumor also changed color and became ulcerated. So, the fact that you don't mention any of this about your mom's lump makes me think it might be good news. Melanoma is unpredictable, but I'd think one would expect at least some growth in a nodular melanoma over that period of time. My aunt had something similar to what you describe, and hers was basal cell. Try not to worry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 6:22 am
Something you might take hope in is that, from what you've said, your mom's lump doesn't appear to have grown or changed much over the past year and a half. My dad's primary melanoma was also a small fleshy-pink colored lump, but it grew upwards, outwards and, we later found out, in depth at a very fast pace. Within just a couple months, it had doubled in size and went from the size of a pencil eraser to the size of a golf ball between April and September. His tumor also changed color and became ulcerated. So, the fact that you don't mention any of this about your mom's lump makes me think it might be good news. Melanoma is unpredictable, but I'd think one would expect at least some growth in a nodular melanoma over that period of time. My aunt had something similar to what you describe, and hers was basal cell. Try not to worry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 6:22 am
Something you might take hope in is that, from what you've said, your mom's lump doesn't appear to have grown or changed much over the past year and a half. My dad's primary melanoma was also a small fleshy-pink colored lump, but it grew upwards, outwards and, we later found out, in depth at a very fast pace. Within just a couple months, it had doubled in size and went from the size of a pencil eraser to the size of a golf ball between April and September. His tumor also changed color and became ulcerated. So, the fact that you don't mention any of this about your mom's lump makes me think it might be good news. Melanoma is unpredictable, but I'd think one would expect at least some growth in a nodular melanoma over that period of time. My aunt had something similar to what you describe, and hers was basal cell. Try not to worry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 6:22 am
Something you might take hope in is that, from what you've said, your mom's lump doesn't appear to have grown or changed much over the past year and a half. My dad's primary melanoma was also a small fleshy-pink colored lump, but it grew upwards, outwards and, we later found out, in depth at a very fast pace. Within just a couple months, it had doubled in size and went from the size of a pencil eraser to the size of a golf ball between April and September. His tumor also changed color and became ulcerated. So, the fact that you don't mention any of this about your mom's lump makes me think it might be good news. Melanoma is unpredictable, but I'd think one would expect at least some growth in a nodular melanoma over that period of time. My aunt had something similar to what you describe, and hers was basal cell. Try not to worry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 6:22 am
Something you might take hope in is that, from what you've said, your mom's lump doesn't appear to have grown or changed much over the past year and a half. My dad's primary melanoma was also a small fleshy-pink colored lump, but it grew upwards, outwards and, we later found out, in depth at a very fast pace. Within just a couple months, it had doubled in size and went from the size of a pencil eraser to the size of a golf ball between April and September. His tumor also changed color and became ulcerated. So, the fact that you don't mention any of this about your mom's lump makes me think it might be good news. Melanoma is unpredictable, but I'd think one would expect at least some growth in a nodular melanoma over that period of time. My aunt had something similar to what you describe, and hers was basal cell. Try not to worry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 6:22 am
Something you might take hope in is that, from what you've said, your mom's lump doesn't appear to have grown or changed much over the past year and a half. My dad's primary melanoma was also a small fleshy-pink colored lump, but it grew upwards, outwards and, we later found out, in depth at a very fast pace. Within just a couple months, it had doubled in size and went from the size of a pencil eraser to the size of a golf ball between April and September. His tumor also changed color and became ulcerated. So, the fact that you don't mention any of this about your mom's lump makes me think it might be good news. Melanoma is unpredictable, but I'd think one would expect at least some growth in a nodular melanoma over that period of time. My aunt had something similar to what you describe, and hers was basal cell. Try not to worry.
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- October 23, 2014 at 7:35 am
You have to put the worry out of your mind and just think that in the worst case scenario, you'll deal with it. When we found out that my dad's cancer had metastasized to his lungs, I cried for days and pretty much had him dead and buried. But here we are, carrying on and going through treatment. You'll also carry on and be strong whenever that day comes for your mother, whether with cancer or anything else. My whole life I thought I'd never survive losing my mom, but I did because I had to be strong for my dad. And now I'm on the path with him, whether it's this or something else that takes him. I guess what I'm trying to say is to not buy trouble right now, but know that whenever the time comes, you'll handle it. But, honestly, with what you described, I really don't think it will come back as melanoma.
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- October 23, 2014 at 7:35 am
You have to put the worry out of your mind and just think that in the worst case scenario, you'll deal with it. When we found out that my dad's cancer had metastasized to his lungs, I cried for days and pretty much had him dead and buried. But here we are, carrying on and going through treatment. You'll also carry on and be strong whenever that day comes for your mother, whether with cancer or anything else. My whole life I thought I'd never survive losing my mom, but I did because I had to be strong for my dad. And now I'm on the path with him, whether it's this or something else that takes him. I guess what I'm trying to say is to not buy trouble right now, but know that whenever the time comes, you'll handle it. But, honestly, with what you described, I really don't think it will come back as melanoma.
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- October 23, 2014 at 7:35 am
You have to put the worry out of your mind and just think that in the worst case scenario, you'll deal with it. When we found out that my dad's cancer had metastasized to his lungs, I cried for days and pretty much had him dead and buried. But here we are, carrying on and going through treatment. You'll also carry on and be strong whenever that day comes for your mother, whether with cancer or anything else. My whole life I thought I'd never survive losing my mom, but I did because I had to be strong for my dad. And now I'm on the path with him, whether it's this or something else that takes him. I guess what I'm trying to say is to not buy trouble right now, but know that whenever the time comes, you'll handle it. But, honestly, with what you described, I really don't think it will come back as melanoma.
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- October 23, 2014 at 1:58 pm
As many of us know, waiting is probably the hardest part! I have found that I feel lots better when I pray, listen to music that I really like, get fresh air, watch a funny tv show, go for a walk, or do something nice for someone. I'd advise her not to do random searches on the internet about melanoma…lots and lots of old data and just plain stupid stuff that does nothing but upset you even more.
Hoping for the best news possible!
Terrie
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- October 23, 2014 at 1:58 pm
As many of us know, waiting is probably the hardest part! I have found that I feel lots better when I pray, listen to music that I really like, get fresh air, watch a funny tv show, go for a walk, or do something nice for someone. I'd advise her not to do random searches on the internet about melanoma…lots and lots of old data and just plain stupid stuff that does nothing but upset you even more.
Hoping for the best news possible!
Terrie
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- October 23, 2014 at 1:58 pm
As many of us know, waiting is probably the hardest part! I have found that I feel lots better when I pray, listen to music that I really like, get fresh air, watch a funny tv show, go for a walk, or do something nice for someone. I'd advise her not to do random searches on the internet about melanoma…lots and lots of old data and just plain stupid stuff that does nothing but upset you even more.
Hoping for the best news possible!
Terrie
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- October 24, 2014 at 12:19 am
Mom is very nervous tonight.Saying she’s not ready to die.Wants someone to tell her everything will be ok.This wait is awful-
- October 24, 2014 at 5:24 pm
Jim,
Tell your Mom that even if it is melanoma, chances are it is at a very early stage. Anything in situ or Stage 1 has a 5-year survival rate of well over 95%. (I'm not sure of the exact numbers.) AND, if it is in a later stage, there are many, many therapies that have come out in the last couple of years that are showing remarkable progress in treating this disease. Lots of people are learning to "live with melanoma".
Telling her not to worry won't help, and will probably feel dismissive to her. Give her some positive facts to hold onto until you get that pathology report. And do yourself a favor and stay off the internet except for this site. Most sites that discuss melanoma have outdated therapies and survival statistics.
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- October 25, 2014 at 1:59 am
Thank you,thank you for the info.She seems more positive today while also saying she’s a wreck inside.I’ve had to stop getting on the internet.Too scary.Glad to hear a lot of it is outdated.Determined to get through this but the wait is hard.Thanks again to everyone. -
- October 25, 2014 at 1:59 am
Thank you,thank you for the info.She seems more positive today while also saying she’s a wreck inside.I’ve had to stop getting on the internet.Too scary.Glad to hear a lot of it is outdated.Determined to get through this but the wait is hard.Thanks again to everyone. -
- October 25, 2014 at 1:59 am
Thank you,thank you for the info.She seems more positive today while also saying she’s a wreck inside.I’ve had to stop getting on the internet.Too scary.Glad to hear a lot of it is outdated.Determined to get through this but the wait is hard.Thanks again to everyone. -
- October 24, 2014 at 5:24 pm
Jim,
Tell your Mom that even if it is melanoma, chances are it is at a very early stage. Anything in situ or Stage 1 has a 5-year survival rate of well over 95%. (I'm not sure of the exact numbers.) AND, if it is in a later stage, there are many, many therapies that have come out in the last couple of years that are showing remarkable progress in treating this disease. Lots of people are learning to "live with melanoma".
Telling her not to worry won't help, and will probably feel dismissive to her. Give her some positive facts to hold onto until you get that pathology report. And do yourself a favor and stay off the internet except for this site. Most sites that discuss melanoma have outdated therapies and survival statistics.
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- October 24, 2014 at 5:24 pm
Jim,
Tell your Mom that even if it is melanoma, chances are it is at a very early stage. Anything in situ or Stage 1 has a 5-year survival rate of well over 95%. (I'm not sure of the exact numbers.) AND, if it is in a later stage, there are many, many therapies that have come out in the last couple of years that are showing remarkable progress in treating this disease. Lots of people are learning to "live with melanoma".
Telling her not to worry won't help, and will probably feel dismissive to her. Give her some positive facts to hold onto until you get that pathology report. And do yourself a favor and stay off the internet except for this site. Most sites that discuss melanoma have outdated therapies and survival statistics.
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Tagged: cutaneous melanoma
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